Navigating Awkward Questions at Christmas: A Smart Girl’s Guide

Christmas is a time for being together, seeing lots of family, and enjoying each other's company. But it's also the time of year when you sometimes get asked awkward questions. Do you have a boyfriend yet? When are you getting married? Do you have a real job yet? When are you going to have kids? Huh, are you quitting meat? These questions are often not meant to be malicious, but they can be incredibly awkward. Answering them correctly (or cleverly avoiding them) is a real challenge. In this blog post, we'll give you foolproof answers to the 4 most frequently asked questions, plus helpful tips for other, unexpected questions.

1. 35 and still single? What was wrong with that guy from last year? When are you going to get married?

Hopelessly outdated, but still the standard for some people. 🤷‍♀️

There's no timeline to follow, and it's no one's business how you live your life (sorry, Grandma). But since family dinner isn't the best time for such discussions, it's best to respond as calmly as possible.

If you're single, consider being honest by telling your family the truth about your last breakup, why you're enjoying your single life so much, or tell them about all the interesting people you've met this year.

Are you in a relationship and not planning to get married (yet)? Just tell your family how much you're enjoying being together.

And if you and your sweetheart aren't into getting married at all, that's totally OK and you can say so – nothing wrong with that!

2. Isn't it time for children? When will <your child> get a little brother or sister?

Once you're married or in a serious relationship, this question is inevitable. But if we could make it disappear, we would. REALLY!

Because it's a terrible question. Whether or not to have children is a personal choice. And for some, it's even more than that – for couples who are having trouble conceiving, or have experienced a miscarriage, it's not a choice at all.

If you feel comfortable with the person asking the question and want to be open, you can share your plans, problems, doubts, or frustrations. Sharing a loss or, for example, fertility issues can even be healing.

If you'd rather not say anything about this, simply respond with, "That's an interesting question, but I don't have an answer."

You can give the same answer when family members ask about "the second." Because as soon as the first one is one or two, and you're barely sleeping through the night, the whole world is expecting a second.

Maybe you don't want a second child at all, you're not sure yet, it's not working out, or you're just not thinking about it at all. The safest answer?

"When we're tired of the first one." 😅

3. When will you finally get a serious job? Are you still working at that one company?

This, like all the other questions, is probably well-intentioned. But indirectly, it does imply that your current job is apparently not good enough. Try to stay calm, and remember that your family members might be asking this because they want to see you happy (and think another job will give you all the happiness!).

Are you happy with your current job? Then tell them. Enthusiastically share what you love about it – your colleagues, the freedom, the money, the connections, the work. It might be something your family doesn't know about at all.

Do you agree with the person asking and are you interested in changing jobs? Then ask them for contacts! Who knows, something good might come of it. And if they don't have any contacts, the conversation is over immediately – just as easy.

4. Do you not eat meat anymore?!

Saying no to your grandma's roast dinner or that piece of meat on the raclette grill? It can be a shock for some, but know that as a vegetarian or vegan, you're not alone! More and more people are choosing to eliminate meat from their diets – even at Christmas.

Tell your family openly why you're making this choice and what your motivations are, but don't try to persuade them. No one likes being lectured.

Do they show no understanding for your choice?

Try to have compassion – everyone lives their life the way they feel is right for them. A meatless lifestyle probably doesn't suit them, and that's perfectly fine.

You can also address dietary questions head-on by bringing a delicious vegan or vegan dish. This way, you're guaranteed to enjoy your meal, and you might even inspire your family! 👌

5. A question you didn't see coming?

No matter how well prepared you are, you don't have a crystal ball. There's always a question that might leave you speechless.

What do you do then?

If you feel awkward, try turning the question around. Smile and ask your conversation partner, or stay on topic and let your conversation partner do the talking.

Most people like to talk about themselves, and this is a good way to divert attention from yourself.

A few examples:

When are you having children?

Oh, haha, I don't know, how old were you when you had Lieve?

When are you going to bring a nice guy to dinner?

Phew, no idea. How did you actually meet?

And if all else fails, try humor. It's the best way to lighten the mood. Make a joke, stuff your mouth with food, or strike up a conversation with someone else.

What's the most awkward question you've ever been asked? We'd love to know! Send us a message or leave a comment on Instagram or Facebook!